Picks for 2007

Well, we're back from a week at the Vaughans' (that's our second youngest daughter and her husband), and ready for whatever the year ahead may bring, including 'flu. In the manner of so many newspaper columnists, may I present a look ahead to what the year may have in store:

Films:
No-one will ever know for certain which films may be a hit, but I predict that among them will not be 'Algy and the Bear,' an adaptation of the famous epic poem of that name. The bear refused to eat Algy, who got the whole team arrested. Another film that will not make the cinemas is 'The Magnificent Seven: Out of the Grave' after the director was refused permission to dig up Yul Brynner.

Politics:
Whether or not there is a snap election, I predict that the Apathy Party will continue to receive no votes in elections. They cannot be bothered to vote, nor campaign.

Celebrities:
Whoever will be noticed this year, one self-promoter from Great Yarmouth will not be discovered. My wife hit him on the head with a shovel and dumped him in a load of concrete. He's now part of the harbour.

The Stars:
What do the stars say for 2007, the Chinese Year of the Pig? Well, not enough, clearly, as the local astrologer for the Great Snoring Mercury ventured into Lesser Pudding and was burned for his foul sorcery.

Next time: What you won't be seeing on the silver screen - in depth.