More from the Inspector's Files

Having successfully repulsed the attempts to recover these files and set a guard of armed villagers around the manor, I shall continue my exploration of the inspection report on Pudding Norton College. The dormitory block (shown below) was revealed to have no roof, the lead an tiles having been sold to local merchants. Evidence of recent building work showed that an attempt to improve the facillities had been made, only to halt abruptly for lack of funds. Further research showed that the practice of foring students to undertake slave labour had been halted after three had died. Still, it was noted that there were now proper facilities for the girls, although the webcams were reported to be illegal, as the practice (illustrated) of sending out promising sixth-formers to entrap wealthy married men, thus forcing them to become patrons of the college if they don't want their wives to find out.

They are alo employed, as the poster shows, as 'Divorce Bait,' by women who wnat to be able to get lots of alimony from their husbands. In fact, the whole approach to senior girls in Sixth form is unspeakably sordid. However, at least the girls' dorms have windows. The Boys' dorms are without glass in their windows, and there are twelve single rooms without windows that are used for solitary confinement.

I hate having to reproduce the College's 'Community Service and Business' brochure, but it should give you an idea of the cess-pool of corruption that is Pudding Norton College.

And I haven't even started on the curriculum yet. Must go, apparently the villagers need me to preside over a manorial court. Probably got another taxman to bury alive. Or a vacum cleaner salesman to burn as a warlock. We did once have a County Council candidate impaled on the village sign. It had to be specially sharpened. I tried to say that I didn't mind, but they just said she was a usurper and impaled her.